315维权
每年的315都是道歉的好时候，晚会之后各大上榜企业花式道歉，虽然每年都是同一套模板，毫无新意。今年的315也不出意外的暴雷几家知名企业，当然了，大企业央妈肯定是手下留情了，不管是某拉的换芯事件，还是某达房产的烂尾。小企业的暴雷同样让人瞠目结舌，涉及面最广的要数老坛酸菜面事件了，毕竟在国内泡面的市场虽然萎缩，但依旧很大……
毫无新意的道歉模板
作为国内方便面龙头，康师傅在昨天给出了声明，只是有些老套和不诚恳，究其原因还不是因为国内针对食品安全的处罚力度比较轻，违法成本远远小于处罚成本。至于统一方面，老坛酸菜面是他的主打系列，此次自营的电商平台全部下架或屏蔽老坛酸菜面系列的确给了统一点压力，致歉声明来得相对更早一些，只是不痛不痒的几句话是否真的能让企业规范起来也只有天知道了。
各电商平台的大戏
315晚会曝光之后，各大电商平台都及时的采取了操作，下架或者屏蔽了老坛酸菜相关的关键词，但是后续操作却有些不一样了。网传京东平台采取的政策是只要袋装未开都可以找官方客服退货，一如既往的电商平台售后标杆。而淘宝就弱了很多，毕竟大部分售后都是由商家自行处理，5连包的老坛酸菜面如果是拆开了大包装，那么就无法退货了，相比较起来售后服务是真的拉跨。本次要表扬的是拼多多平台，虽然小管家一直不待见，但是拼多多平台在此次泡面事件中的处理方式还是让小管家直呼真香。小管家实测找官方客服可以凭订单号申请退货而没有什么条件限制。
白象的上位
要说本次最大得利者就要非白象莫属了。真的是全靠同行衬托，冬奥会残疾人的热搜也只是让白象小火了一把，而这波315统一、康师傅的集体暴雷真是把白象推到了大家面前。本来白象企业的爱国情怀让一部分战狼PTSD愤愤不已，叫嚣着爱国绑架，味道才是一切。这紧接着的打脸就让白象环顾四周发现在座的都是垃圾，赤裸裸的《破坏之王》名场面重现。
本篇完
民以食为天，食品安全问题真是重于泰山。国家促进经济发展，不想过于打压资本的想法是好的，但是当获利远大于违法成本的时候就不免有人会铤而走险了。该是时候打压一下资本的势头了，小管家相信很快就有新的法案要试行了。
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